Welcome to the IHoP

[mrray13 30]

lol at fonzi...it has been a long week bro...but don't sweat it...i'll get in touch with him monday!!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[jntar 15]

Just got back from the meeting...ZZZZZZ

[04BlueSRT 0]

Why the sad face srt4?

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Personal probs I'm sure you all don't want to hear about. Just a sad week brutha.

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spill if u gotta man....

that's what we are here for bro!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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Got into a bad fight with the Mrs. last weekend, lot of dumb stupid chit was said by me and I hurt her emotionally. Talked for awhile Saturday night. Went out of town on Sunday and Monday, Tuesday she came here at work and ate lunch with me, I thought everything was A-OK. Yesterday sitting here at work (12 hour day no less) get a knot in my stomach, thinking something is very wrong. I call in a relief and go home about 12:30PM, call the wife at work 2 times and she doesn't answer.

She walks in the door at 5:30PM and I asked her where she was and she said she had some things to do for herself. I asked if she's cheating, she says she wants to be with someone else. Knife in my heart man. I ask if there is already someone, and she says yes. I asked if she was with him this afternoon and she said yes. I asked what they were doing and she says all they did was kiss and hold each other. She claims this is the first time they have ever been alone together. I know I haven't been the greatest and I did and said some crappy things to her, but I would never ever cheat on her. She said she felt unloved and unwanted. I have felt the same thing many times in this relationship and anger is the only way I have dealt with it.

We talked last night and I think she wants to stay with me, but we will have to work hard at this. I keep thinking about her with someone else and it's eating at me. I think deep down she did more and will not tell me because she's afraid of what I might do. I am at a loss for anything, I haven't eaten since Wednesday night, I have a cold and generally feel really crappy and this is just adding onto the stress.

I seriously want to put a .45 hollow-point through my head. I can't deal with the stress or the pain. I don't know what to do. I told her I love her and want to be with her, I've apologized up and down. I know this will not be fixed overnight, but she can't decide what she wants to do. I told her to talk to him and then she can decide, I already told her how I feel. I only want her to be happy. I can't imagine what the fudge I'd do if she picked him over me. I feel like the biggest arseho in the world. I can't believe how I've treated her, and I only realize this now.

[Supa_c 1]

just a bit to deep for me before i go to work.

i'll have to read it later

[Devillain 0]

That's pretty rough man. Im not even going to begin to say I know the feeling or the pain you are going through.

Think about this though, if you did work it out, would you constantly be thinking about her and that she could have possibly done more. Even after you work it out, if that's still in the back of your mind, it might cause problems later down the road. That type of thing takes counseling and dedication. A lot of time just like you said.

If she does make a decision to leave and be with the other guy, like you said you would have to let it go, and I know that is waaay easier said than done.

This is all coming from outside, cuz I dont really know you ya know, but I hope you come to some kind of conclusion, hopefully the best for you.

C

[mrray13 30]

Got into a bad fight with the Mrs. last weekend, lot of dumb stupid chit was said by me and I hurt her emotionally. Talked for awhile Saturday night. Went out of town on Sunday and Monday, Tuesday she came here at work and ate lunch with me, I thought everything was A-OK. Yesterday sitting here at work (12 hour day no less) get a knot in my stomach, thinking something is very wrong. I call in a relief and go home about 12:30PM, call the wife at work 2 times and she doesn't answer.

She walks in the door at 5:30PM and I asked her where she was and she said she had some things to do for herself. I asked if she's cheating, she says she wants to be with someone else. Knife in my heart man. I ask if there is already someone, and she says yes. I asked if she was with him this afternoon and she said yes. I asked what they were doing and she says all they did was kiss and hold each other. She claims this is the first time they have ever been alone together. I know I haven't been the greatest and I did and said some crappy things to her, but I would never ever cheat on her. She said she felt unloved and unwanted. I have felt the same thing many times in this relationship and anger is the only way I have dealt with it.

We talked last night and I think she wants to stay with me, but we will have to work hard at this. I keep thinking about her with someone else and it's eating at me. I think deep down she did more and will not tell me because she's afraid of what I might do. I am at a loss for anything, I haven't eaten since Wednesday night, I have a cold and generally feel really crappy and this is just adding onto the stress.

I seriously want to put a .45 hollow-point through my head. I can't deal with the stress or the pain. I don't know what to do. I told her I love her and want to be with her, I've apologized up and down. I know this will not be fixed overnight, but she can't decide what she wants to do. I told her to talk to him and then she can decide, I already told her how I feel. I only want her to be happy. I can't imagine what the fudge I'd do if she picked him over me. I feel like the biggest arseho in the world. I can't believe how I've treated her, and I only realize this now.

damn man...

well, other then the part about the bullet, i think you're on the right track. you have done what you can, and understand where you were wrong. now, the ball is in her court.

and as much as it would hurt if she was to choose the other man, you would have to look at the other end of the tunnel and know that in the end you will come out of this alright as well. if you feel as though that would be the bottom, then there is only one way to go...up.

but regardless of her decision, you have to stay strong, no matter how hard it is. a bullet solves nothing, only creates more. i think you know that though.

a couple of things to remember, no relationship is perfect. there is always going to be a riff here and there. and you will always make mistakes, it's how you deal with them that makes you who you are.

in the end, i think you'll be fine bro. might take awhile, but you'll do just fine!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[04BlueSRT 0]

Thanks Devillain and Kent, I am at a total loss.

[Nikuk 1]

not that it is much consolation, but I went through a very similar time with a girlfriend about 6 years ago. we were young and kinda stupid. I was 18, she was 19. whatever. But we had a huuuuge fight and i ended up sleeping in my car for a week or so. we broke up, didnt see each other for a couple of years acutally.

we're getting married June 9, of next year.

We both did some growing & learning. We ended up together at a bar one night and talked for ~3 days. Realized how happy we can make each other and how much we loved each other. Been taking it one day at a time for 3+ years now.

-Nick

[Devillain 0]

Thanks Devillain and Kent, I am at a total loss.

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Anytime homie, any other thoughts you have, Ill always listen.

[Aaron Clinton 2,372]

Why the sad face srt4?

Personal probs I'm sure you all don't want to hear about. Just a sad week brutha.

spill if u gotta man....

that's what we are here for bro!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Got into a bad fight with the Mrs. last weekend, lot of dumb stupid chit was said by me and I hurt her emotionally. Talked for awhile Saturday night. Went out of town on Sunday and Monday, Tuesday she came here at work and ate lunch with me, I thought everything was A-OK. Yesterday sitting here at work (12 hour day no less) get a knot in my stomach, thinking something is very wrong. I call in a relief and go home about 12:30PM, call the wife at work 2 times and she doesn't answer.

She walks in the door at 5:30PM and I asked her where she was and she said she had some things to do for herself. I asked if she's cheating, she says she wants to be with someone else. Knife in my heart man. I ask if there is already someone, and she says yes. I asked if she was with him this afternoon and she said yes. I asked what they were doing and she says all they did was kiss and hold each other. She claims this is the first time they have ever been alone together. I know I haven't been the greatest and I did and said some crappy things to her, but I would never ever cheat on her. She said she felt unloved and unwanted. I have felt the same thing many times in this relationship and anger is the only way I have dealt with it.

We talked last night and I think she wants to stay with me, but we will have to work hard at this. I keep thinking about her with someone else and it's eating at me. I think deep down she did more and will not tell me because she's afraid of what I might do. I am at a loss for anything, I haven't eaten since Wednesday night, I have a cold and generally feel really crappy and this is just adding onto the stress.

I seriously want to put a .45 hollow-point through my head. I can't deal with the stress or the pain. I don't know what to do. I told her I love her and want to be with her, I've apologized up and down. I know this will not be fixed overnight, but she can't decide what she wants to do. I told her to talk to him and then she can decide, I already told her how I feel. I only want her to be happy. I can't imagine what the fudge I'd do if she picked him over me. I feel like the biggest arseho in the world. I can't believe how I've treated her, and I only realize this now.

I am very very sorry to hear about that,

the best thing is to not smother her, she will decide the same if you are all over her or with her as you usually are, I would give it a little bit of time, yes I know it is easy for me to sit here and say that, but I have been through similar messes numerous times

just tell her you love her, and be there for her, but don't to anything that will force her to make a decision, women can be extrememly cold and destructive without remorse or second thought, so you have to weather the storm, she might be going through a rough spot, and she should realize a marriage is not worth ditching over a bad fight, ,

good luck ed, we are here for ya, if you want to call me and have an ear to talk to I am here for ya

good luck, I know exactly the feeling you are having right now, I went from 195lbs to 172 in June because I thought I lost Amanda

[04BlueSRT 0]

Thanks man, I appreciate you guys. My stupidity made my whole world come crashing in last night. She says she still loves me, but how can she do something like this if that's true?

[Aaron Clinton 2,372]

Thanks man, I appreciate you guys. My stupidity made my whole world come crashing in last night. She says she still loves me, but how can she do something like this if that's true?

we will never understand the ways of the woman, and how the woman's mind works, they are unpredictable and unreliable,

but love her, but try to look for the best in what you have

[Nikuk 1]

fear, insecurity, anger, confusion.... that species works in strange ways.

more to the point, think about the last time that You did something that was dumb in retrospect.

It doesnt take much for a thought / insecurity to make things seems 1000x worse to a woman. Who knows what the reasoning was... I would think that the important thing is that she WANTS to make it work with You.

[04BlueSRT 0]

I will Aaron, thanks man I have no one else talk to. Karma is a female dog man, being a dick and dedicated to my job (which I can't stand anymore) has finally caught up to me.

Nick, I hope she does want to stay with me, and I can think of many times in the past week that I've done or said something dumb.

[mrray13 30]

ed, like mentioned, the ways of the female are beyond any of us. grab what strings you can, and hang on! women can be /are a rough ride.

i've been married ten years, been with her for 14. we seperated for two months over her family. i missed her terribly, but she had to understand that i married her, not her mom and dad. we eventually moved away from all family and blam! our relationship went to a whole other level. we couldn't be happier. is it perfect? nope, i'm not mature enough...lol. but it works, and it's fun. it's been a great 14 years, even with ups and downs. 14 years i wouldn't trade for anything.

now, you have got to realize, and i think you have, that you married her, not your job. and she married you, not your job. priorities, they have to be straight and in order. i think you've figured that out now. and you'll be a better person because of it. and if the winds blow in your favor, your relationship with your wife will be better as well.

she still loves you, but felt the need to see just how much you loved her. IMO, that is just what she is teaching you. "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned"..remember that..lol...it'll come in handy.

give her space and your love. show her you have made amends and she'll come around. but it's a two way street, it has to be in order for it to work!

in the end, it'll be fine.

told ya we would try to help!!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[02BlackOnBlackSS 1]

Well, on a happier note, My DEI 1100D5 just came in :dancingsmilie:

[02BlackOnBlackSS 1]

Maybe you just need a new project to keep you busy for the time being. That seems to get my mind off of stuff pretty well.

[Acidburn 10]

although i may not have any stories like the old guys here , i hope everything works out for the best

and x2 to whoever said women are crazy

[mrray13 30]

who u callin old phool??

lol...

and nice to hear black!! it's always good to get packages in da mail!!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[Acidburn 10]

who u callin old phool??

lol...

and nice to hear black!! it's always good to get packages in da mail!!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Aaron and Nick

pirates cant be old

[mrray13 30]

who u callin old phool??

lol...

and nice to hear black!! it's always good to get packages in da mail!!

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Aaron and Nick

pirates cant be old

das right....

lol...

and i'm a styln pirate to boot...

hehe

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[04BlueSRT 0]

Much appreciated guys. Your the best.

[jntar 15]

Ed,

good luck with whatever you both decide. Seems like Nick, Aaron, Kent, and Divillian have said everything/anything that I would have. All I can tell you is I hope for the best.

PS. A bullet is never the answer. TRUST me. It makes things worse for your family and friends. I hope you were being sarcastic, again, good luck

[Aaron Clinton 2,372]

Well, on a happier note, My DEI 1100D5 just came in  :dancingsmilie:

pix !!!!!!!!!!!

[02BlackOnBlackSS 1]

I've got another big package coming in today that denim would like.

Consists of: Lowering Springs, Lower Control Arms, an Adjustable Panhard Rod, and Lower Control Arm Relocation Brackets (since the car will be lower). That should be on the car tonight if the ups man comes soon enough.