> The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent bombings and > security threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to > "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to > "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." > > Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea > supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from > "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a > "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666. > > Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its > terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in > France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by > a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively > paralyzing the country's military capability. > > It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of > alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "S hout Loudly and > Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: > "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides." > > The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful > Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also > have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose." > > Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only > thing they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels
